Friday, January 3, 2014

What rules do you live by or wish to live by


Someone sent me this on Facebook & I had to share it with you because I thought it was a perfect way to describe me.

Well I shouldn't be so hasty by implying I am all of this, but I do honestly try to be.

With so many setting new goals for themselves this year...I am not one since I know anything I say I will screw up within a matter of hours or days.....

diet....good until I eat that first box of cookies or bag of candy

dress nicer...good until I go out to muck the hen house & yes I do wear the fancy long dresses to do this in, but then tend to smell like chicken poo for the rest of the day.  Ok I really don't care but sometimes the dirty hand prints across the butt area make people look at me funny.  Plus I never go anywhere fancy so only the neighbors & kids see me dresses up & they don't seem to shy away from my smelly self.

save Money....ok I am on the floor laughing.....what money????  Well maybe the change I tend to find on the floor next to the washing machine & put in my big pink piggy bank. but don't you have to have a job first to be able to do that?

So as you can see I am not good at the whole make the New Year better type of person, so I have to fall back on what I already know & can do.  So that's why the pretty sign thingie up above.  Plus I have always hated the having to PROVE yourself concept to get others to feel good about you.

I think falling back on the non-tangible things you learned as you were growing up are always the best way to go, unless you grew up doing the wrong things & are now a ex-con.....just so you know I am not nor ever plan that life style for myself...honestly I think it would be too much work & I'd rather nap.

Ok now back to what this whole blog was suppose to be able.....In my little world I still see too  many bad things occurring, children out of control, families falling apart, rude strangers walking about or in their cars who think nothing of creating a bad day for others....the list just never seems to end.  But I myself can be in control of how I see & react to my little world.

One of the most important things I have learned in 50 something years is the words 'Thank you'.....in some ways they mean more to me that the words 'I love you'.  You can tear a person down by never saying those 2 words to them when they help you, even if its in a small way.  Being loved is great don't get me wrong, but those 2 words have a unbelievable power on a persons self-esteem.  How often do you hear that phrase said now a-days?  If you are one of the lucky ones, you hear it often but then hopefully say it as well.

Being loved makes you feel all warm & safe inside but those 2 simple words can make you feel like you can move the world.  For me they are very powerful words & I try to use them often....not in a off handed way but I really mean them when I say them to others. To share & show gratitude never gets old & you never know how you may change a persons day by doing it with a simple thank you.

Keeping promises is not something I ever say.....I may say I will TRY but I learned a long time ago promises are too easy to break or blow off & people get hurt by them.  I do like the concept of them but I just can't  do it, but I admire others who can.  Now you may hear me say I promise to drive safe or behave & those I mean, but I will always be honest & tell you No I can't promise something.....so being Honest is a big thing for me in my life.

Honesty is another idea we were taught that seems to have fallen to the way side.....I can't even stand little white lies anymore.  For me a lie is a lie...no saying its a white lie like that makes it any better.  Alright I must back up because I do lie when it comes to things like children who believe in Santa, the Easter bunny & so on.  I believed in them as a child & eventually learned its part of the magic of being a child & I refuse to take that away from them.  Plus those lies are not meant to ever hurt like other lies. Children get to learn the hard facts of life soon enough so I want them to have those happy lies as long as they can have them.  But once you've gotten through that stage I don't want your lies even if you say it was to protect me.  Cause I am telling you now it was to protect you not me.

I have lost many people in my life, so for me I try to let others know I love them often.  I have no problem telling my friends & family I love them each time I speak to them before I leave to go home or get off the phone.  How many times in life have you wished you could say that just one more time to someone who is no longer here?  They are easy to say & you don't have to be all mushy about it, but its nice to feel comfortable enough to say them.

I do have problems occasionally being gentle with others specially when they have ticked me off, but I tend to blow up or walk away which helps.  I have learned just because you don't always see eye to eye that being gentle in manner or words can help not only them but you.  I think if you can't say something nice its better to let the discussion end & walk away.  Sometimes we get so caught up in what's going on we speak before we think & what was meant to be kindness sounds harsh & mean.  Its hard to give in mentally when you feel something very strongly but its not your place to be the voice for someone else. 

I have also found that being older, I know things some of the younger ones haven't learned or know yet.  So this makes it hard for this old woman to keep her mouth shut & to treat them in a gentle method.  I have to remember that when I was younger I didn't want to hear what an elder did with the same problems I was having & that advise was not always welcomed.  so this learning to be gentle with others is something I still am working on & will probably be for the rest of my life cause I am telling you its one of the harder for me. 

Now sharing love & sharing kindness I don't seem to have much of a problem with...if anything I can honestly say I feel both of these with the people I know.....funny how sharing kindness is so different from the being gentle.  I am one of those people who never seems to meet a stranger.  I can talk to anyone as if I have known them my whole life.  Plus even though I prefer to be alone most of the time, when I am out I can walk up to anyone & visit, I don't feel any embarrassment of being this way.  Plus its nice to be able to chat while waiting in a grocery line, to share a smile or just a few words.  I know that some people have really made my day much happier by just speaking to me for a few seconds or giving me a smile.

The one thing I really like about this little list above is the 'laughing at yourself', boy am I good at that since I tend to do so many silly things without thinking about it.  I can't tell you the many times just being able to laugh at myself has saved me from hours of tears or pain.  Specially when I do something that hurts like falling or running into something.  Yes there are times I can't laugh & I do give in & cry for a bit but most of the time I can see a bit of humor in the horrible.  Living on the Farm I did quite a bit of laughing at myself since I did go through a few bad moments, but was able to see the humor instead of the pain, plus being able to go pick up one of my hens to comfort me. 

There was nothing better to put a smile on my face than when one of my hens would talk me through the pain...yea they talk...may have no clue to what they are really saying but they seemed to say what was needed saying at the moment.  I am sure they spent a few times laughing at me as well though they were very good at never letting me see it.

Since I have always been one to do a lot of charity I think I have the 'consider others' down pretty good, plus it seems to be in my nature to try & help/listen/be there for anyone that needs me.  When I tend to feel like I need to hid is when I know that I need to be out with other people.  Even if its just opening a door for someone or letting someone go in front of me at a store.  I think of this concept as 'Do a good deed' & its something I try to consciously do whenever I am outside my home.

The one thing I love about our little Blue collar town, is people here are much nicer when things are crazy compared to the bigger towns I have lived in.  People seem to be more patient, less angry or in a rush here, so being considerate of others is easier for me.  Its another way of also using the words 'Thank you' when you get a small bit of help unexpectedly.  When we moved here in 2008 I was so used to being flipped off, screamed at, cut off in the car that at first I had a hard time adjusting again to a calmer town where only the teens in a hurry once schools out, do I ever get honked at or flipped off...& those I can ignore cause they are teens in their own little world plus it happens very seldom here.  I also know someday they will be me & some teen will do the same thing so they will get their payback.......big smile on my face right now.

The last thing on the list is 'Do your best' three very simple words, but have a very big meaning.  For each of us it also has a different meaning, my best may not be as good/better than yours, but each of us has the goal of what we want to do throughout our lives.  We probably will never get to the point we feel we can not get any better & how cool is that?  To do your best may not always be fair/simple/easy but I think each day we have the ability to show others & ourselves just what we can do. 

I know I will never be a billionaire, a Great famous artist or a top notch chicken Queen but its fun to dream about all of them & see where the day will lead me.  Whether its a hard working day or a simply easy day I like that whatever it is I did, I did my best, not for someone else but me.  I don't always need to hear-I love you, thank you & so on (from someone else) to know that I love myself & I thank myself for the things I did.

The one thing that wasn't up there that I feel I need to add is to 'appreciate yourself'  That may sound vain or self serving but I think we all need to know we are important to ourselves as well as to others.  It took decades for me to learn to love myself & to appreciate who I am...& it was not an easy thing for me to accomplish but I am finally there.  I will never set the world on fire nor make huge changes to the world I live in, but I do think me being in it is a good thing & I know that my chickens & family are glad I am here.  Sometimes the small things we do while alive are the big things people will remember us by when we have passed on.  Plus who else would allow my chickens free run of their house?

Ok enough seriousness for this blog, but I just had to share this little list with you just so you can see all the wonderful things about yourselves that you may have forgotten or don't see.  Each of us has these wonderful things inside us & sometimes we just need to be reminded.

Until next time have a Great Chicken day!

Michele'



 

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